The Project Gutenberg eBook of Daddy Do-Funny's Wisdom Jingles

This ebook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this ebook or online at www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this eBook.

Title: Daddy Do-Funny's Wisdom Jingles

Author: Ruth McEnery Stuart

Illustrator: G. H. Clements

Release date: September 25, 2006 [eBook #19363]

Language: English

Credits: Produced by Janet Blenkinship and The Online Distributed

Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was

produced from images generously made available by The

Internet Archive/American Libraries.)

*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK DADDY DO-FUNNY'S WISDOM JINGLES ***

DADDY DO-FUNNY'S

WISDOM JINGLES

BY

RUTH McENERY STUART

ILLUSTRATED BY G. H. CLEMENTS

NEW YORK

THE CENTURY CO.

1916

Copyright, 1910, 1911, 1912, 1913, by

THE CENTURY CO.

Published, October, 1913

DADDY'S WEATHER PRAYER

THE OLD ROOSTER

THE BUTTERFLY

THE WREN

THE WATERMELON

THE GOURD

JUDGE OWL

THE MOSQUITO

CONFESSION

THE GAME-COCK

THE EPICURE

THE MULE

THE GRUBWORM

RAIN OR SHINE?

LITTLE GREEN TREE-TOAD

SPARROWS

THE FLY

THE LITTLE CHICKEN

THE SCARE-CROW

THE YELLOW ROSE

THE AMBITIOUS COW

TRIED BY FIRE

JACK-O'LANTERN

THE FLEA

WILL O' THE WISP

THE MOLE

THE RUNT

THE MONKEY

THE ARISTOCRAT

THE CRAWFISH

THE ANGLEWORM

THE CHIMNEY-SWALLOW

CATCHING DOODLE-BUGS

THE PORCUPINE

ANTS

THE PARROT

THE RATTLE-SNAKE

THE PERSIMMON

IN HARNESS

THE CANARY

ANSWERING BACK

DAT'S DE WAY MY LADY'LL DO

THE MAMMY ALLIGATOR

THE NEW RICH

THE WIBBLY WABBLY CALF

THE TURKEY-GOBBLER

THE CAULIFLOWER

THE STEPMOTHER

THE FROG

THE RAT

THE MOCKING-BIRD

THE MUSHROOM

THE MEASURING WORM

THE TOP-KNOT HEN

TOO FAMILIAR

THE 'POSSUM

THE OWL

THE CHAMELEON

THE CATERPILLAR

DR. DRAKE

THE PEACOCK

THE ALLIGATOR

THE TERRAPIN

THE DANDELION

THE CUD

THE MIRROR

GOSLINGS

THE PET

THE GUINEA-HEN

THE MOON

THE HEN-ROOST MAN

A GUILTY CONSCIENCE

THE BAT

INCUBATOR CHICKENS

THE FIREFLY

THE THISTLE

THE GRAY SQUIRREL

LOOK OUT FOR MISTER BEE

THE ROSE

THE LOCOMOTIVE

THE GOAT

THE FIG

THE FRIZZLED CHICKEN

THE ENDLESS SONG

THE EEL

THE RAIN-CROW

THE GIRAFFE

THE BLACK SHEEP

THE PRIZE-WINNER

THE DOG

To the Memory of those faithful brown slave-men of the plantations throughout the South, Daddy's contemporaries all, who during the war while their masters were away fighting in a cause opposed to their emancipation, brought their blankets and slept outside their mistresses' doors, thus keeping night-watch over otherwise unprotected women and children—a faithful guardianship of which the annals of those troublous times record no instance of betrayal.

FOREWORD

In presenting a loyal and venerable ex-slave as an artless exponent of freedom, freedom of conduct as well as of speech, the author of this trivial volume is perhaps not composing an individual so truly as individualizing a composite, if the expression will pass.

The grizzled brown dispenser of homely admonitions is a figure not unfamiliar to those who have "moved in plantation circles" in the cotton and sugar country, and touched hands with the kindly dark survivors of the old regime.

If the man, Daddy Do-funny, was unique as an individual, perhaps in the very fact of an individuality unembarrassed by the limitations of convention, of education and of precedent, he becomes in a sense typical of his people and of his time.

Of course, a man is not called Do-funny for nothing, not even playfully and in the free vernacular of rusticity at its freest.

One of a small community of superannuated pensioners upon the bounty of their former owners, Daddy was easily first citizen of Evergreen annex on Crepe Myrtle plantation, which is to say he was therein a personage of place and of privilege, coming and going at will, doing as he pleased, and as, with uplifted eye, he reverently boasted, "sponsible to nobody but Almighty Gord for manners and behavior."

Even so late as this year of grace, a full half century after "emancipation," there are still to be found on many of the larger plantations in the far South a few such members of the order of the Rocking-chair, whose records of "good and honorable service" reach back through periods of bondage, even such kindergartners as septuagenarians in the privileged class, having clear title to nearly a quarter of a century of slave memories; not to mention the occasional centenarian with even his semi-occasional uncle or father poking around, toothless and white-plumed dignitaries, these, sometimes with leaders, being blind, but ever important in pride of association and memory.

It is something even if one is bent double and may never again behold the light of day, to be able to reach back into a dim and forgotten past and to say, "I remember," especially when the memory recalls days of brilliance and of importance.

But Daddy's place among the gentle Knights and Ladies of the Rocking-chair was far and away above such as these whose thoughts, alert though they were and loyal, travelled forever backward to the sweet but worn fields of memory where every pleasure is a recognition and fashions do not change—a restful retreat for dreamers whose days of activity are done.

But Daddy's mind worked forward and upward and although he did not know the alphabet excepting by rote, a common ante-bellum plantation accomplishment, and while professing high contempt for what he called "cold shelf-knowledge," his reputation for wisdom, wisdom as gleaned in observation and experience and "ripened by insight," was supreme, while his way of casually tossing it off in bits in playful epigram finally gave the word its plural form so that the expression "Do-Funny Wisdoms" came into familiar use.

As an example of his rambling talk, much of which seems at least semivagarious on transcription, I recall one of his meandering dissertations on the value of experience as superior to observation.

Several of the old people, his neighbors, had joined the listening children who surrounded him under the fig-tree, and perhaps he unconsciously deferred to them in his accent of their common possession in length of days, although he gave no sign of heed to any audience, when he said:

"Dey's mighty few facts de same behind an' befo', not to say inside an' outside, and a man can go roun' an' roun' de blackberry bush an' not git nowhar. 'Spe'unce is a thorny bramble, an' yer 'bleeged to go th'ough it, to draw blood, an', I tell yer, de blood is de life!"

Although this tribute brought grunts of approval from the gray heads, Daddy was soon off at a tangent in playful fancy, hitting off a foible or "celebrating truth and justice" in one of the unconscious epigrams which it is sought herein to preserve, even when having occasionally to hammer them into shape, for, while Daddy was almost unerring in rhyme, his rhythm, never at fault in delivery, was strictly a temperamental matter, not adequately renderable in cold print.

But more than as philosopher, satirist or seer was the old man distinguished as a social factor on the place. Wherever his chair was set, there were the children gathered together, both black and white, eager listeners to his quaint pictorial recitals, even seeming to cherish the "Wisdoms" which fell from his tongue, as is not a common way with children, who seem instinctively to spurn the obviously didactic.

But Daddy's moralizing, besides its saving grace of imagery, was generally sequential and convincing; while his repartee, to use a word which seems almost a misfit in this rural setting, had a way of hitting the mark and striking fire, as when, in reply to the question from a forth-putting youngster on one occasion, "Where do you keep all your wisdoms, Daddy?" he snapped:

"In my ole toof holes, dat's whar! Wisdoms don't ripen good tel yo' toofs is ready to drap out. Ev'rybody knows dat Gord A'mighty ain't nuver is set but one live Wisdom-toof in a man's mouf—an' dat comes late an' goes early."

And then he added with a mischievous smile:

"You-all smarty undergrowth, you ain't chawed life yit. You jes 'speramintin' wid yo' milk-toofs.

"Now's yo' havin' time, chillen, but to have an' to lose, dat's life!

"Study wisdom now an' minch on it good wid yo yo'ng baby toofs an' hol' fas' to it, so's it'll meller down ripe, time de caverns opens for it.

"But look out! I knows a lot o' ole vacant wisdom caves for rent behin' dis crepe myrtle hedge—so, I say, watch and pray! Pray for insight an' outsight! An' even so, dey's some wisdoms so fine you can't see 'em tel you nearin' Home an' livin' on de far side o' life!"

Daddy lived alone in a tiny vine-clad cabin and there were times when he seemed frail and to need care, and the doctor said he was rheumatic. This, however, he denied, declining companionship while he insisted that the sharp pains which occasionally twisted his brow were only growing pains which he was glad to endure as not having got his growth in his first childhood, he was "'bleeged to wrastle wid it in de second," and, "of course," he added, "it comes harder when a man's bones is set."

On days when his pains were bad, he would propel himself around in a roller-chair, which he called his chariot; and although evidently suffering, he was never heard to complain. Once, when he seemed almost helpless, some one asked him how he had got into the chair, and was quickly silenced by his ready answer, "Gord lifted me in!"

Now, to Daddy clothes were clothes. In dress as in manners, he knew no obligation of precedent; and as to fashion, the word made him chuckle.

When his pains were unusually severe and it was difficult for him to get into his own garments, he did not hesitate to clothe himself in one of the flowing wrappers which his old wife, Judy, long since dead, had worn.

And thus it happened that while on some days an aged man might have been seen hobbling about, working among his plants, on others there appeared to be an old woman propelling herself around in a rolling chair; and seeing her, his neighbors, with perhaps a chuckle, would remark, "I see Daddy Do-funny is laid up ag'in!"

Another peculiar habit of the old man was the way in which he took his bath—a dangerous process, one would think, for a rheumatic, but harmless, no doubt, to growing pains. Seeing the rain coming, he would exclaim: "Gord sendeth de rain! He's offerin' me a bath—just or unjust!" Then donning his "bath-slip," an old wool wrapper of Judy's and getting into his roller-chair, he would wheel out and sit calmly in the shower, often closing his eyes and lifting his face as he exclaimed: "Bless Gord for de sweet drops! Bless Gord for de rain!" and when he had had bath enough, he would either put up his umbrella or roll his chair indoors as he felt inclined.

But perhaps we cannot get nearer the soul of the old man than by recalling a conversation which occurred during an invasion of the children, a conversation between him and his guests which is thrown into a sort of rhyme for easy memorizing, passing from one speaker to another without more than the natural pause for reply.

Obviously, the children began it:

"Ol' Daddy Do-funny,

How do you come on?"

"Po'ly, thank Gord, honey,

Po'ly dis morn.

My ol' spine it's sort o' stiff,

An' my arms dey 'fuze to lif'.

An' de miz'ry 's in my breas',

An' I got some heart-distress.

An' de growin' pains dey lingers,

In my knee-j'ints an' my fingers,

But I'm well, praise Gord, dis mornin'."

"Ol' Daddy Do-funny,

What cuyus talk!

How is you well, when you

Can't even walk?"

"Hush, you foolish chillen, hush!

What's dat singin' in de brush?

Ain't dat yonder blue de sky?

Feel de cool breeze passin' by!

Dis ol' painful back an' knee,

Laws-a-mussy, dey ain't me!

I'm well, praise Gord, dis mornin'!"

RUTH McENERY STUART.

DADDY DO-FUNNY'S WISDOM JINGLES

DADDY'S WEATHER PRAYER

One asks for sun, an' one for rain,

An' sometimes bofe together;

I prays for sunshine in my heart,

An' den forgits de weather

THE OLD ROOSTER

Ef de hoa'se ol' rooster wouldn't crow so loud

He mought pass for yo'ng in de barn-yard crowd;

But he strives so hard an' he steps so spry

Dat de pullets all winks whilst he marches by.

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat--

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE BUTTERFLY

Sis' Butterfly aimed to work all right,

But 'er wings dey was heavy, an' 'er head too light;

So she riz in de air, 'ca'ze she see she was made

Jes' to fly in de sun in de beauty parade.

An' she ain't by 'erself in dat, in dat--

An' she ain't by 'erself in dat.

THE WREN

She's a citizen-bird, Sis little brown Wren,

She nests in de spring an' de fall again;

"Race suicide" talk nuver fazes her,

'Ca'ze she's good for 'er ten little wrens a year.

An' she ain't by 'erself, my ladies, in dat—

No, she ain't by 'erself in dat.

THE WATERMELON

Oh, Watermilion sho' is good to eat!

But de darkie rates it twice-t mo' sweet,

'Ca'ze it's ap' to b'long to de yether man,

An' it's mighty hard to lif' by sleight o' han'.

An' it ain't by itself, made sweet like dat—

No, it ain't by itself like dat.

THE GOURD

De green gou'd on de sunny shed

Was mighty proud of his pethy head,

So he nuver pondered or studied or trained,

An' now he's ol' an' rattle-brained.

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat--

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

JUDGE OWL

Jedge Owl 's so pompious on 'is limb,

You'd s'pose dey was nobody roun' but him;

He's afeard ef he was too polite

You'd ax 'im whar he spent de night.

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat--

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE MOSQUITO

Wid so much Christian blood in 'is veins,

You'd think Br'er 'Skitty would take some pains

To love 'is neighbor an' show good will,

But he's p'izenin' an' back-bitin' still.

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

No, he ain't by 'isself in dat.

CONFESSION

Dat whale wha' gulped Br'er Jonah down

Was bleeged to swim close-t to de groun'

Ontel he riz up an' confessed

He'd swallered mo' 'n he could digest.

But you ain't by yo'self, Br'er Whale, in dat—

No, you ain't by yo'self in dat.

THE GAME-COCK

Dey's some things square an' some things round,

An' little game cocks ain't sol' by de pound;

Dey's weighed by sand an' pluck an' grit

An' de number o' dead dey leave in de pit.

An' dey ain't by deyselves in rank like dat—

No, dey ain't by deyselves in dat.

THE EPICURE

Ef you keep yo' eyes on Br'er Carrion Crow,

You'll wonder huccome he kin carry on so!

He flies in high circles an' chooses meat

Dat no honest workin'-man would eat.

An' he ain't no new high-flyer in dat—

No, he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE MULE

Ef you quiz Br'er Mule, you'll find dat he

Gits mixed on de subjec' of 'is fam'ly tree;

He'll brag about 'is mammy with a noble neigh,

An' deny 'is own daddy wid a ginuine bray.

But he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

But he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE GRUBWORM

Br'er Grubworm wrops 'isself in twine

An' swings in 'is shroud on a evergreen vine,

Becaze it's mortal death dat brings

His on'iest chance to git 'is wings.

But you ain't by yo'self, Br'er Worm, in dat—

Oh, you ain't by yo'self in dat.

RAIN OR SHINE?

Ol' Mingo, on 'is knees, he say:

"Lord, teach dis nigger how to pray,

Else riconcile two kinds o' weather

For craps an' rheumatiz together!"

But you ain't by yo'self, ol' man, in dat—

Oh, you ain't by yo'self in dat.

LITTLE GREEN TREE-TOAD

Little green tree-toad on banana leaf,

Plenty po' relations all aroun' 'im in de bog;

But he'd ruther be blind an' dumb an' deef

Dan to hold a conversation wid a "low-life" frog!

But he ain't no lonesome toady in dat—

No, he ain't by 'isself in dat.

SPARROWS

Dey say dem Sparrers come crost de seas

To eat our surplus grubs an' fleas;

But dey's whupped our birds off'n dis plantation,

Tell we craves to constric' dey immigration.

An' dey ain't by deyselves in dat, in dat—

An' dey ain't by deyselves in dat.

THE FLY

Wid dem suctious foots, seem lak Br'er Fly

Mought draw down health ef he trod de sky;

But he's so onpartic'lar whar he roams

Dat he's got 'isself screened out o' quality homes.

An' he ain't by 'isself outcas' like dat—

No, he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE LITTLE CHICKEN

Little yaller fluff-ball, one day out,

Steps mighty high while he picks all about;

Never sees de egg-shell layin' in 'is track,

Much less the little piece stickin' on 'is back.

But he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

But he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE SCARE-CROW

Br'er Scare-crow's built to suit 'is job

Wid flappin' legs an' arms dat bob;

He ain't got brains for discontent

So he works widout no argument.

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

No, he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE YELLOW ROSE

Dey's a sweet plantation, yaller-buff rose

Dat in my ricollection grows;

In my ol' dreams she seems to wait

Whar she stood an' bloomed by de love-vine gate

An' I ain't by myself in dreams like dat—

No, I ain't by myself in dat.

THE AMBITIOUS COW

Sis' Twis'-horn Brindle is a bothersome cow,

She's boun' to raise a ruction an' she don't keer how;

She craves to be de bell-cow an' lead off wid a clang,

So it's all a man kin do to make 'er gallup wid de gang.

An' she ain't by 'erself in dat, in dat—

An' she ain't by 'erself in dat.

TRIED BY FIRE

De sugar-cane stands so proud an' smart,

You'd nuver suspicion it sweet at de heart,

But to prove its sweets it yields its will

To be tried by fire an' ground in de mill.

An' it ain't by itself in dat, in dat—

No, it ain't by itself in dat.

JACK-O'LANTERN

Sence he los' 'is brains to git 'is smile,

Brer Jack-o-lantern grins lak a wilderin' chile

Widout no secrets out or in;

An' de lighter in de head de broader 'is grin

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE FLEA

Look out for Mr. Po'-trash Flea!

Ef you let 'im come in, he'll make too free;

He'll chase yo' dog till he makes 'im pant,

An' he'll take yo' skin for a restaurant.

An' he ain't by isself in dat, in dat—

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

WILL O' THE WISP

Ef de Wul o' de Wust would cuss an' swear

An' take some shape, an' rip an' tear,

It wouldn't sen' col' chills down a nigger's spine

Like de changeable expression of a mystery shine.

An' it ain't by its ghostly self in dat—

No, it ain't by itself in dat.

THE MOLE

De blind mole tunnels straight ahead,

An' he gits whar he gwine wid a trustful tread,

But he nuver is yit got nowhar else,

An' he'll nuver view de skies whar glory melts.

But he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

But he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE RUNT

You'll sometimes trace de loudes' grunt

In de horg-lot down to de littles' runt,

Lak as ef he'd 'nounce whilst he gulps 'is swill,

"A pompious horg is as big as 'is will."

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

No, he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE MONKEY

De organ plays an' Br'er Monkey struts,

An' he takes high pride in de capers he cuts,

While folks draps picayunes into 'is han'

For fallin' so short o' bein' a man.

An' he ain't by 'isself, misled like dat—

No, he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE ARISTOCRAT

Dat three-name chicken wid de feathery legs

Wha' 'merged f'om de ten dollar settin' of eggs,

Is a lonesome bird an' I s'picion he frets

'Ca'ze he can't outgrow dem pantalettes.

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE CRAWFISH

Br'er Crawfish th'ows a racklass bluff,

An' he sho do look like fightin' stuff;

But turn 'im loose on a battle-groun',

An' he'll bow 'isself out, an' nuver turn roun'.

But he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

But he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE ANGLEWORM

"I could stand de hook," says de angleworm,

"An' a lily-brook wouldn't make me squirm,

But I can't help wrigglin' ag'in' my fate;

It breaks me all up to be used for bait."

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE CHIMNEY-SWALLOW

Wid 'is nest in de flue whar de suctions blow,

Storms due above an' fire below,

No wonder Br'er Swaller sags an' sways

Like a pusson ableeged to dodge bofe ways.

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

CATCHING DOODLE-BUGS

Little picaninnies, fishin' in de doodle-bug holes.

Wid a "spit for luck," an' straws for poles,

Show pyore delight in de fisherman's aim

All disp'opo'tioned to de game.

An' dey ain't by deyselves in dat, in dat—

An' dey ain't by deyselves in dat.

THE PORCUPINE

Sis' Porcupine, wid 'er bristles all set

In a pompado' style, is waitin' yet,

An' she can't understan', whilst she puckers 'er mug,

De sca'city o' kisses an' de absent hug.

But she ain't by 'er lonesome self in dat—

No, she ain't by 'erself in dat.

ANTS

Dem Ants is sho' got savin' ways

An' even de Scripture 'lows 'em praise;

But dey hoa'ds for deyselves f'om day to day

An' dey stings any man wha' gits in de way.

An' dey ain't no new co'poration in dat—

No, dey ain't by deyselves in dat.

THE PARROT

Sis' Tin-cage Polly wid de roamin' nose

Dat roams f'om 'er eyes tel it p'ints to 'er toes,

She keeps up a ratlin' talkin' pace

To turn off attention f'om de shape of 'er face.

An' you ain't by yo'self, Sis' Polly, in dat—

No, you ain't by yo'self in dat.

THE RATTLE-SNAKE

Br'er Rattle-snake rattles befo' he springs,

But he warns too late to 'scape 'is stings;

His high-class manners don't count for much

'Ca'ze dey grafted on to a sarpent's touch.

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE PERSIMMON

Is you little gals, growin' into women,

Ever tasted a snappy young persimmin?

It takes a hard frost to make it sweet,

An' it's ol' an' swiveled 'fo' it's fit to eat!

But it ain't by itself, sharp chillen, in dat—

No, it ain't by itself in dat.

IN HARNESS

Dat flee-bitten mule an' my bay mare

In de hay-wagon, sho is a mixtious pair;

But dey's pulled so long th'ough wind an' weather

Dat out in de field dey graze together.

An' dey ain't by deyselves in dat, in dat—

An' dey ain't by deyselves in dat.

THE CANARY

De little yaller cage-bird preems 'is wings

An' he mounts 'is pyerch an' sings an' sings;

He feels 'is cage, but I s'pec' he 'low

To take what comes an' sing anyhow!

An' you ain't by yo'self, little bird, in dat—

No, you ain't by yo'self in dat.

ANSWERING BACK

Br'er Pole-cat's got a s'ciety smile

An' he sho is dressed in scrumptious style,

But he keeps 'is own hat off de quality rack

By de scan'lous way he answers back.

But he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

But he ain't by 'isself in dat.

DAT'S DE WAY MY LADY'LL DO

It ain't how many eyes you got,

'Les' needles could see an' potatoes, too;

An' "hookin' a' eye," as like as not,

Would be classed as a sin dat no lady'd do.

But it's keepin' yo' eyes turned to'des de right,

An' to'des de wrong jes' shettin' 'em tight—

Lookin' out for ways to be polite—

Dat's de way my lady'd do!

It ain't how many ears you got

Dat makes you listen an' learn an' do;

Else a hill o' corn in a garden plot

Would be 'way ahead o' me an' you;

But it's shettin' yo' ears to heartless speech,

An' listenin' whilst de teachers teach,

An' strivin' to practise mo' 'n to preach—

Dat's de way my lady'll do!

It ain't how many tongues you got,

'Les' shoes would talk an' wagons, too;

An' all de bells would gabble a lot,

An' tattle an' brag de long day th'ough;

But it's gyardin' yo' tongue f'om talk dat's wrong,

An' passin' a helpful word along,

An' maybe singin' a hopeful song—

Dat's de way my lady'll do!

THE MAMMY ALLIGATOR

Said de mammy alligator, wid a motherly grin:

"I nuver liked babies wid dey dimples tucked in,

But our little pet, wid its horny hide,

Like its mammy's an' its daddy's, is de fam'ly pride."

An' dey ain't by deyselves in dat, in dat—

An' dey ain't by deyselves in dat.

THE NEW RICH

Sis' Mush A. Roon sprung up over night

An' to name whar she sprung f'om ain't polite;

But she spreads 'erself wuss'n me or you,

An' wid on'y one foot to stan' on, too.

An she ain't by er new-come self in dat—

No, she ain't by 'erself in dat.

THE WIBBLY WABBLY CALF

Cunnin' little donkey-baby—

"Ye-haw! Ye-haw!" What a funny laugh!

Soun' jes like a creaky, cranky

Seesaw—seesaw!

Wasn't nothin' funny roun' dat

We saw—we saw!

'Tel we glimpsed de stagger-gait dat

He saw—he saw!

Brindle strikin' swagger-gait when

She saw—she saw—her wibbly wabbly calf!

Den we j'ined wid Mister Donkey,

"He-haw! He-haw!" How we-all did laugh!

But we laughed at some'h'n' mo' dan

He saw—he saw!

Donkey couldn't see de ears dat

We saw—we saw!

Rabbit lopin' down de road, we

Three saw—three saw!

Wagged his ears an' called him daddy!

"Haw-haw! Haw-haw!" How dat—who dat laugh?

An' de last to see de joke was wibbly wabbly calf!

THE TURKEY-GOBBLER

Ol' Gobbly struts aroun' de stable

An' th'ows out hints o' de rich man's table,

An' he h'ists his tail an' spreads it wide,

To display his cuyus graveyard pride.

But he ain't by 'isself in pride like dat—

But he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE CAULIFLOWER

When de cabbage got ambitiom, in a uppish hour

An' lost 'is head an' bu'st into flower

Wid 'is brains outside, an addled, at dat—

He sot 'isself up for a 'ristocrat.

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE STEPMOTHER

Sis' Dominick follers her brood o' ducks

To de bayou's edge, an' she clucks an' clucks:

'Dis stepmammy job, oh me, oh me!

Ain't all dat it's quacked up to be!"

But she ain't by 'erself in dat, in dat—

But she ain't by 'erself in dat.

THE FROG

Ol' Br'er Frog ain't much to sing,

But he clairs a log in a single spring,

An' jedgin' 'im by his bigoty ways,

He's clean forgot 'is tadpole days!

But he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

But he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE RAT

Br'er Rat in de corn-bin over-fed

An' under-worked, an' now he's dead;

He craved to live lak a bloated chief,

An' now he ain't nothin' but a ol' dead thief.

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

No, he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE MOCKING-BIRD

Br'er mockin'-bird sings in de live-oak shade,

A secon'-hand chant or a serenade;

He'll take off a pa'tridge, a robin, or a jay,

But he'd nuver make a name no other way.

But he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

But he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE MUSHROOM

Dey's many a musharoon good to de tas'e

An' rich for de table, dat goes to was'e

'Ca'ze folks don't dast to gether it in

For de way it favors its dung-hill kin.

An' it ain't by itself condemned like dat—

No, it ain't by itself in dat

THE MEASURING WORM

When Br'er Measurin'-worm strikes out so brave,

Makin' tend he kin measure you for yo grave,

Wid all 'is stride an' all 'is stren'th

He can't measure mo'n 'is own little len'th.

An' he ain't by 'isself made cheap like dat—

No, he ain't by 'isself like dat.

THE TOP-KNOT HEN

Hit's a proper pride in Sis' Top-knot's breast

Dat makes 'er step to march 'er crest;

Yit jalousy follers 'er 'roun' de shed

On de count o' dat innercent tufted head.

An' she ain't by 'erself pursued lak dat—

No, she ain't by 'erself in dat.

TOO FAMILIAR

De cantelope gits mighty bilious

F'om runnin' wid punkins too familias,

So it's banished out for its sociable sin

Along wid its yaller kitchen kin.

An' it ain't by itself in dat, in dat—

An' it ain't by itself in dat.

THE 'POSSUM

Br'er 'Possum makes pertend he's dead

Whilst shots goes whizzin' over 'is head.

But time de hounds is out o' sight,

He's up an' "hongry for a fight!"

An' he ain't by 'isself in a bluff like dat—

No, he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE OWL

When de big owl calls out "Who—ooo—ooo—!!!!!"

In de dark o' de moon, like night-owls do,

De chillen, a-beggin' to play out late,

Come tumblin' back into Daddy's gate.

An' dey ain't by deyselves in dat, in dat—

No, dey ain't by deyselves in dat.

THE CHAMELEON

De camelia-lizard is a turn-coat man,

An' he borries his colors where dey's "room to stan'";

He mought keep solid as a county candidate,

But you couldn't sca'cely find 'im on a map o' de State.

But he ain't by 'isself lost out, like dat—

No, he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE CATERPILLAR

Whilst she eats de groun' f'om onder 'er feet,

Sis' Caterpillar's weavin' 'er windin'-sheet;

But 'er red eyes shine an' 'er grass-green-hair,

An' 'er short life's bright, so she don't care.

An' she ain't by 'erself in dat, in dat—

An' she ain't by 'erself in dat.

DR. DRAKE

Ol' Dr. Drake wid 'is college waddle

An' Latin inscriptioms on 'is noddle,

Would part wid 'is gait an' 'is shimmerin' back

To perscribe a crowin'-powder an' nuver say "Quack!"

But he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

But he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE PEACOCK

Br'er Peacock 'lows he's a 'ristocrat,

Wid mighty fine clo'es, an' vain at dat;

He'll answer yo' glance wid col' surprise

An' look you over wid a thousan' eyes!

But he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

But he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE ALLIGATOR

Br'er Alligator kin grin a mile,

But dey ain't no inducemint in his smile;

Whilst he ain't no race-horse, yit dey say

A little alligator goes a mighty long way.

But he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

But he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE TERRAPIN

Br'er Tarrapin draws in 'is head so knowin',

You can't tell whether he's comin' or goin',

But his mind ain't mixed—he's layin' low

Tel he sees which way he's obleeged to go.

An' he ain't no new politician in dat—

No, he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE DANDELION

De dandelion flower blooms out so young

Wid a look in its face like a sassy tongue,

Den it grows light-headed wid self-conceit

Wid a flighty ol' age, for full defeat.

An' it ain't by itself, pert chillen, in dat—

No, it ain't by itself in dat.

THE CUD

"Life's give an' take," Sis' Cow, she laugh.

So I gives my milk an' dey takes my calf."

An' when contentment's hard to fin',

She chaws 'er cud to ease 'er min'.

And you ain't by yo'self, Sis' Cow, in dat—

No, you ain't by yo'self in dat.

THE MIRROR

Br'er Donkey, drinkin' at de brook,

Surveys hisself wid offish look,

An' 'low: "You Jackass makes too free!

Huccome you dast to drink wid me!"

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

Oh, he ain't by 'isself in dat.

GOSLINGS

De purty yaller goslin's say:

"Oh, what—oh, what's de use!

When Mama say, 'Come, walk dis way

An' ac' jes like a goose!'

Oh, what's de use—oh, what's de use?

I's boun' to grow a noddle,

Like every goosey, goosey, goose,

An' waddle, waddle, waddle!

"But Mama say: 'Don't talk dat way!

Come, waddle like a mild goose,

F'om side to side, wid proper pride—

Not like a woodsy wild goose!

Dey's plenty use—dey's plenty use!

Come, git yo' education!

See how to waddle an' tote yo' noddle

Accordin' to yo' station!'"

THE PET

De little white chicken dat's petted too much

Gits stunted in growth f'om de sp'ilin' touch.

An' she'll nuver make a hen so brave an' good

As ef she went a-pickin', an' worked wid de brood.

An' she ain't by 'erself in dat, in dat—

No, she ain't by 'erself in dat.

THE GUINEA-HEN

Sis' Guinea, in proud week-day clo'es

Forgits how she was hatched outdo's;

Wid 'er red boot chicks, she cuts a dash,

An' calls 'er neighbors "Po' trash! Po' trash!"[1]

But she ain't by 'erself in dat—

But she ain't by 'erself in dat.

THE MOON

Dey say Sis' Moon daresn't shine at night

Cep'n by Marse Sun's allowance o' light,

An' whilst he's away whar de yether moons are

She don't even dast to wink at a star.

An' she ain't de onies' wife like dat—

No, she ain't by 'erself in dat.

THE HEN-ROOST MAN

De Hen-roost Man he'll preach about Paul,

An' James an' John, an' Herod, an' all,

But nuver a word about Peter, oh, no!

He's afeard he'll hear dat rooster crow.

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

A GUILTY CONSCIENCE

Dat little yaller pup 's got so many lickin's

For pesterin' all de ducks an' chickens,

Dat whenever he hears any barn-yard strife,

He looks over his shoulder an' runs for 's life.

But he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

No, he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE BAT

Br'er Bat flaps out in de gloomin' dark,

An' even ef he's boun' for a harmless lark,

He favors de devil an' he keeps sech hours

Dat he seems in cahoot wid de evil powers.

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

INCUBATOR CHICKENS

Dem inkybator chickens dat's hatched by de clock,

Wid a lamp for love, is lonesome stock;

Dey feeds in droves, but dey envies de others

Dat scratches for grubs wid any ol' mothers.

An' dey ain't by deyselves, po' orphans, in dat—

No, dey ain't by deyselves in dat.

THE FIREFLY

Br'er Lightnin'-bug is a gay yo'ng spark,

But he nuver is yit put out de dark;

He shines for 'isself in 'is zigzag flight,

An' he's middlin' sho he's de sou'ce of light.

But he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

But he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE THISTLE

De thistle-stalk sends up a noble bloom

Wid de shape of a flower an' de thought of a plume,

But its prickle-y ways turn friendship down;

So it stands all alone, in its velvet gown.

An' it ain't by its lonesome self in dat—

No, it ain't by itself in dat.

THE GRAY SQUIRREL

De gray squir'l lives a nachel life,

Wid friends an' foes an' chillen an' wife;

But whenever he gits his picture took,

He snatches dat nut, to appear in de book.

But he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

But he ain't by 'isself in dat.

LOOK OUT FOR MISTER BEE

Look out for Mister Bee in de punkin-flower!

Plenty gallinippers in de grass!

Mighty close tie 'twix' wings an' stings

Better let de honey-bee pass!

Z—Z—Z, Z, Z!

Better let de honey-bee pass!

White-face bumblebee—white folks' ways—

Never give a sassy answer back!

But don't you trus' de black-face, no matter what he says!

Give de nigger bumblebee de track!

Z—Z—Z, Z, Z!

Give de nigger bumblebee de track![2]

THE ROSE

When Sis' Rose th'ows open her heart too proud,

She blooms mighty brief in Beauty's crowd;

'Ca'ze the rains beat in an' de bees make free

'Tel de heart o' de rose is sad to see.

An' you ain't by yo'self, Sis' Rose, in dat—

No, you ain't by yo'self in dat.

THE LOCOMOTIVE

Dey say Sis' Ingine's fiercest scream

Don't mean nothin' but lettin' off steam,

But wid so much wrackage behin' 'er back,

Seem like she say: "Git out o' my track!"

An' she ain't by 'erself, old Mis, in dat—

No, she ain't by 'erself in dat.

THE GOAT

No matter how much she strive to 'spire,

Sis' Nannie Goat's measured 'g'inst some'h'n' higher;

"First cousin to a sheep" an' "de po' man's cow,"

Is hol'-down luck, come when, come how.

An' she ain't by 'erself helt down like dat—

No, she ain't by 'erself in dat.

THE FIG

De fig dat's "sweet enough to eat"

Is sweet enough, but not too sweet;

But de honey-lip fig in de blazin' light

Is a battle-ground whar de varmints fight.

An' it ain't by itself in dat, in dat—

An' it ain't by itself in dat.

THE FRIZZLED CHICKEN

Dat frizzledy chicken, he steps so spry,

An' he totes 'is head so pompious high,

Like as ef he tries, wharever he goes,

To rise above dem rough-dried clo'es.

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE ENDLESS SONG

Oh, I used to sing a song,

An' dey said it was too long,

So I cut it off de en'

To accommodate a frien'

Nex' do', nex' do'—

To accommodate a frien' nex' do'.

But it made de matter wuss

Dan it had been at de fus,

'Ca'ze de en' was gone, an' den

Co'se it didn't have no en'

Any mo', any mo'—

Oh, it didn't have no en' any mo'!

So, to save my frien' from sinnin',

I cut off de song's beginnin';

Still he cusses right along

Whilst I sings about my song

Jes so, jes so—

Whilst I sings about my song jes so.

How to please 'im is my riddle,

So I'll fall back on my fiddle;

For I'd stan' myself on en'

To accommodate a frien'

Nex' do', nex' do'—

To accommodate a frien' nex' do'.

THE EEL

Br'er Eel got a mighty jewbious name,

But maybe he ain't so much to blame;

He couldn't squirm out ef he nuver ventured in,

An' he resks his all when he resks his skin.

But he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

But he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE RAIN-CROW

Br'er Rain-crow sho kin prophesy,

Caze he reads his wisdom f'om de page on high;

His mind ain't clogged wid secon'-hand facts,

But de moon an' de skies is his almanacs.

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE GIRAFFE

Br'er Gy-raffe don't make no pertense

O' not seein' over 'is neighbor's fence,

An' ef he'd listen close-t, I 'spec'

He'd hear somebody say: "Rubber-neck!!!"

But he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

But he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE BLACK SHEEP

De black sheep says, "Oh, what's de use

To shun de mire an' de muddy sluice?

For whether I walks for praise or blame,

Dey'll call me 'black sheep,' jes de same!"

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE PRIZE-WINNER

Dat Berkshire horg in de blue ribbon pen

Come home wid de heavy-weight prize again;

He looks mighty pompious in 'is stall,

But he's on'y a fat horg, after all.

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat, in dat—

An' he ain't by 'isself in dat.

THE DOG

I can't talk dog an' he can't talk man,

Yit Rover an' me, we onderstan';

I wag my tongue an' he wags 'is tail,

An' Love explains whar grammars fail.

An' we ain't by ourselves in dat, in dat—

No, we ain't by ourselves in dat.

FOOTNOTES:

[1] The guinea-fowl strays away from home and makes her nest in the fields. The newly hatched guinea-chicks are beautiful, dainty things, with coral-colored feet which look very fine. The guinea's cry, loud and harsh, sounds like "Potterack!" or "Poor trash!"

[2] The white-faced bee does not sting.

*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK DADDY DO-FUNNY'S WISDOM JINGLES ***

Updated editions will replace the previous one—the old editions will be renamed.

Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project Gutenberg™ electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG™ concept and trademark. Project Gutenberg is a registered trademark, and may not be used if you charge for an eBook, except by following the terms of the trademark license, including paying royalties for use of the Project Gutenberg trademark. If you do not charge anything for copies of this eBook, complying with the trademark license is very easy. You may use this eBook for nearly any purpose such as creation of derivative works, reports, performances and research. Project Gutenberg eBooks may be modified and printed and given away—you may do practically ANYTHING in the United States with eBooks not protected by U.S. copyright law. Redistribution is subject to the trademark license, especially commercial redistribution.

START: FULL LICENSE

THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE

PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK

To protect the Project Gutenberg™ mission of promoting the free distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work (or any other work associated in any way with the phrase “Project Gutenberg”), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full Project Gutenberg™ License available with this file or online at www.gutenberg.org/license.

Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project Gutenberg™ electronic works

1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg™ electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property (trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or destroy all copies of Project Gutenberg™ electronic works in your possession. If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a Project Gutenberg™ electronic work and you do not agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the person or entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph 1.E.8.

1.B. “Project Gutenberg” is a registered trademark. It may only be used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg™ electronic works even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project Gutenberg™ electronic works if you follow the terms of this agreement and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg™ electronic works. See paragraph 1.E below.

1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation (“the Foundation” or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection of Project Gutenberg™ electronic works. Nearly all the individual works in the collection are in the public domain in the United States. If an individual work is unprotected by copyright law in the United States and you are located in the United States, we do not claim a right to prevent you from copying, distributing, performing, displaying or creating derivative works based on the work as long as all references to Project Gutenberg are removed. Of course, we hope that you will support the Project Gutenberg™ mission of promoting free access to electronic works by freely sharing Project Gutenberg™ works in compliance with the terms of this agreement for keeping the Project Gutenberg™ name associated with the work. You can easily comply with the terms of this agreement by keeping this work in the same format with its attached full Project Gutenberg™ License when you share it without charge with others.

1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are in a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States, check the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this agreement before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, distributing or creating derivative works based on this work or any other Project Gutenberg™ work. The Foundation makes no representations concerning the copyright status of any work in any country other than the United States.

1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg:

1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other immediate access to, the full Project Gutenberg™ License must appear prominently whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg™ work (any work on which the phrase “Project Gutenberg” appears, or with which the phrase “Project Gutenberg” is associated) is accessed, displayed, performed, viewed, copied or distributed:

This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this eBook.

1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg™ electronic work is derived from texts not protected by U.S. copyright law (does not contain a notice indicating that it is posted with permission of the copyright holder), the work can be copied and distributed to anyone in the United States without paying any fees or charges. If you are redistributing or providing access to a work with the phrase “Project Gutenberg” associated with or appearing on the work, you must comply either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 or obtain permission for the use of the work and the Project Gutenberg™ trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or 1.E.9.

1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg™ electronic work is posted with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any additional terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms will be linked to the Project Gutenberg™ License for all works posted with the permission of the copyright holder found at the beginning of this work.

1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg™ License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg™.

1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project Gutenberg™ License.

1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including any word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access to or distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg™ work in a format other than “Plain Vanilla ASCII” or other format used in the official version posted on the official Project Gutenberg™ website (www.gutenberg.org), you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense to the user, provide a copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means of obtaining a copy upon request, of the work in its original “Plain Vanilla ASCII” or other form. Any alternate format must include the full Project Gutenberg™ License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1.

1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg™ works unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9.

1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing access to or distributing Project Gutenberg™ electronic works provided that:

- • You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from the use of Project Gutenberg™ works calculated using the method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is owed to the owner of the Project Gutenberg™ trademark, but he has agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments must be paid within 60 days following each date on which you prepare (or are legally required to prepare) your periodic tax returns. Royalty payments should be clearly marked as such and sent to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the address specified in Section 4, “Information about donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation.”

- • You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg™ License. You must require such a user to return or destroy all copies of the works possessed in a physical medium and discontinue all use of and all access to other copies of Project Gutenberg™ works.

- • You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of any money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days of receipt of the work.

- • You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free distribution of Project Gutenberg™ works.

1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project Gutenberg™ electronic work or group of works on different terms than are set forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing from the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the manager of the Project Gutenberg™ trademark. Contact the Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below.

1.F.

1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread works not protected by U.S. copyright law in creating the Project Gutenberg™ collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg™ electronic works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may contain “Defects,” such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate or corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other intellectual property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or other medium, a computer virus, or computer codes that damage or cannot be read by your equipment.

1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the “Right of Replacement or Refund” described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project Gutenberg™ trademark, and any other party distributing a Project Gutenberg™ electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH 1.F.3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGE.

1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium with your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you with the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in lieu of a refund. If you received the work electronically, the person or entity providing it to you may choose to give you a second opportunity to receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If the second copy is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing without further opportunities to fix the problem.

1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you ‘AS-IS’, WITH NO OTHER WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE.

1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of damages. If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement violates the law of the state applicable to this agreement, the agreement shall be interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or limitation permitted by the applicable state law. The invalidity or unenforceability of any provision of this agreement shall not void the remaining provisions.

1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone providing copies of Project Gutenberg™ electronic works in accordance with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the production, promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg™ electronic works, harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, including legal fees, that arise directly or indirectly from any of the following which you do or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this or any Project Gutenberg™ work, (b) alteration, modification, or additions or deletions to any Project Gutenberg™ work, and (c) any Defect you cause.

Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg™

Project Gutenberg™ is synonymous with the free distribution of electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of computers including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It exists because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations from people in all walks of life.

Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the assistance they need are critical to reaching Project Gutenberg™’s goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg™ collection will remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure and permanent future for Project Gutenberg™ and future generations. To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and how your efforts and donations can help, see Sections 3 and 4 and the Foundation information page at www.gutenberg.org.

Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation

The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non-profit 501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal Revenue Service. The Foundation’s EIN or federal tax identification number is 64-6221541. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent permitted by U.S. federal laws and your state’s laws.

The Foundation’s business office is located at 809 North 1500 West, Salt Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887. Email contact links and up to date contact information can be found at the Foundation’s website and official page at www.gutenberg.org/contact

Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation

Project Gutenberg™ depends upon and cannot survive without widespread public support and donations to carry out its mission of increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be freely distributed in machine-readable form accessible by the widest array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations ($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt status with the IRS.

The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To SEND DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any particular state visit www.gutenberg.org/donate.

While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who approach us with offers to donate.

International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff.

Please check the Project Gutenberg web pages for current donation methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. To donate, please visit: www.gutenberg.org/donate.

Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg™ electronic works

Professor Michael S. Hart was the originator of the Project Gutenberg™ concept of a library of electronic works that could be freely shared with anyone. For forty years, he produced and distributed Project Gutenberg™ eBooks with only a loose network of volunteer support.

Project Gutenberg™ eBooks are often created from several printed editions, all of which are confirmed as not protected by copyright in the U.S. unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not necessarily keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper edition.

Most people start at our website which has the main PG search facility: www.gutenberg.org.

This website includes information about Project Gutenberg™, including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks.

Table of Contents

DADDY DO-FUNNY'S WISDOM JINGLES

RUTH McENERY STUART

ILLUSTRATED BY G. H. CLEMENTS

To the Memory of those faithful brown slave-men of the plantations throughout the South, Daddy's contemporaries all, who during the war while their masters were away fighting in a cause opposed to their emancipation, brought their blankets and slept outside their mistresses' doors, thus keeping night-watch over otherwise unprotected women and children—a faithful guardianship of which the annals of those troublous times record no instance of betrayal.

FOREWORD

DADDY DO-FUNNY'S WISDOM JINGLES

DADDY'S WEATHER PRAYER

THE OLD ROOSTER

THE BUTTERFLY

THE WREN

THE WATERMELON

THE GOURD

JUDGE OWL

THE MOSQUITO

CONFESSION

THE GAME-COCK

THE EPICURE

THE MULE

THE GRUBWORM

RAIN OR SHINE?

LITTLE GREEN TREE-TOAD

SPARROWS

THE FLY

THE LITTLE CHICKEN

THE SCARE-CROW

THE YELLOW ROSE

THE AMBITIOUS COW

TRIED BY FIRE

JACK-O'LANTERN

THE FLEA

WILL O' THE WISP

THE MOLE

THE RUNT

THE MONKEY

THE ARISTOCRAT

THE CRAWFISH

THE ANGLEWORM

THE CHIMNEY-SWALLOW

CATCHING DOODLE-BUGS

THE PORCUPINE

ANTS

THE PARROT

THE RATTLE-SNAKE

THE PERSIMMON

IN HARNESS

THE CANARY

ANSWERING BACK

DAT'S DE WAY MY LADY'LL DO

THE MAMMY ALLIGATOR

THE NEW RICH

THE WIBBLY WABBLY CALF

THE TURKEY-GOBBLER

THE CAULIFLOWER

THE STEPMOTHER

THE FROG

THE RAT

THE MOCKING-BIRD

THE MUSHROOM

THE MEASURING WORM

THE TOP-KNOT HEN

TOO FAMILIAR

THE 'POSSUM

THE OWL

THE CHAMELEON

THE CATERPILLAR

DR. DRAKE

THE PEACOCK

THE ALLIGATOR

THE TERRAPIN

THE DANDELION

THE CUD

THE MIRROR

GOSLINGS

THE PET

THE GUINEA-HEN

THE MOON

THE HEN-ROOST MAN

A GUILTY CONSCIENCE

THE BAT

INCUBATOR CHICKENS

THE FIREFLY

THE THISTLE

THE GRAY SQUIRREL

LOOK OUT FOR MISTER BEE

THE ROSE

THE LOCOMOTIVE

THE GOAT

THE FIG

THE FRIZZLED CHICKEN

THE ENDLESS SONG

THE EEL

THE RAIN-CROW

THE GIRAFFE

THE BLACK SHEEP

THE PRIZE-WINNER

THE DOG

FOOTNOTES:

THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE